Monday, April 20, 2015

Happy Trails: Ring of Fire

I fell into a burnin' ring of fire
I went down, down, down
And the flames went higher,
And it burns, burns, burns,
The ring of fire, the ring of fire.

Johnny Cash: Ring of Fire

Welcome back to Happy Trails! A trailer park challenge with tons of spunk and barely clothed sim women who like to stomp roaches. Well, I could be lying about the first thing, but I know I'm not about the second.

Last time we visited our plucky founder SimShan, she and her dearly beloved Bella had discovered the joys of indoor plumbing and the not so joyous realities of birthing babies, but that isn't going to deter this family sim. No, after the first baby up rolled the ten kid want. Anyways, onward march!

"Oh look, my tummy popped out."
"I thought when you said you were going to outdo that Duggar bitch, you meant you were going to."
"But it's quicker this way!"



SimShan is proving to be as adept at cooking as RLShan.

And here comes the food poisoning...

"Waaaaaaah....I'm having babies....and I'm sick...."
Oh Bella...don't do this.

"Nao, Bella, ziss fancy whirring zhing will make all your worries fly away."
"No more babies?"
"Naooo, zhere is nozhing I cahn do about zhat."
"What use are you then? Where's that damn punch barrel?"
That's ma girl.

Look!! The babies grew up! Bobbi Jo is up top and Earl is on the bottom.
Isn't that awesome, I matched the linoleum from the kitchen to the bathroom! 

It's the little things folks.

Toddlers do what toddlers are going to do best, and that is bug one very preggers mommy about getting a diaper change...

And send the other back to see The Doctor.

This one unfortunately doesn't have a tardis, but he is crazy enough.

Sleep can only be found while standing in pee puddles in this happy trailer.

Or in your green, fly infested lunch meat sandwhich.

They find ways to keep the spark alive.

And we have babies!! The little one up top is Toby, named so after Toby Keith.
The little one on the bottom is Reba, named after the ever wonderful, Reba.

Oh the lovely life of trailerhood. Dirty, decaying newspapers on the front porch, two nasty toilets, one spewing pee water everywhere. One mom tucked away in bed, one passed out next to the pee water. And a giant stash of stinky bottles green clouding up my badass linoleum and two highchairs.

Life of luxury my friends.

Why so sad Shan?

"My flamingo is on fire! Waaaaaah!"
"We have lit the flames of war comrades. The blonde one weeps for the fate of the pink one."
"We shall rule!"
"No more feet! No more stomping!"

With the lighting of the flames of war on our dearest flamingo Danica, I shall leave you to wonder:
Exactly how serious is Shan about outdoing the Duggars?
What do the roaches plan next?
Will the next chapter be more entertaining?

Find out all that, and more coming soon!

The point breakdown:
+1  for every wedding party in the main house
 +2  for every heir that marries while they or their spouse are showing a baby bump
 +2  for each legitimate pregnancy (x4)
+10  for every 6 x 20 trailer on the lot
Point total: 21

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